There’s an old saying where I come from: happy wife, happy life.
And if you want a happy wife, here’s some things not to say to her courtesy of the brilliant Tim Hawkins:
If Obama was a good husband, he would have said to his wife: ‘Sweetheart, stand about a foot to the left before they take the photograph.’ You’ll see why just here:
While we’re on the subject of interesting photographs, take a look at this one. Do you recognize this man? No? Good – because he isn’t anyone famous. He just hired a cameraman, some photographers and two bodyguards to chase him around Time Square. And look what happened!
Of course, being famous won’t necessarily mean that people will love you. Here’s what the French magazine ‘Liberation’ thinks of Mitt Romney.
To which he’d probably say: ‘Bite me.’
But that may not always be the right response, especially if he’s talking to a mosquito in the US right now. In the interests of public health and safety, you should read this post from Karen McFarland, who recently had a nasty encounter with the West Nile virus.
On the subject of public health – this is just totally brilliant. It’s really left field – but it also makes a lot of sense. Bob Mayer writes great blogs about novel writing and indie publishing: but this week he suggests that Lance Armstrong may possibly hold the key to curing certain cancers – if only he would come clean. Read this, think about it and tell me if you think it’s possible.
Do you know who invented “It was a dark and stormy night …”?
It was a nineteenth century British baron by the name of Edward George Earle Lytton Bulwer-Lytton, whose prose was so bad he had a bad writing competition named after him. Here’s a recent entry:
“The “clunk” of the guillotine blade’s release reminded Marie Antoinette, quite briefly, of the sound of the wooden leg of her favorite manservant …”
To see more head over to Kathy Owen’s blog right here and see just how purple prose can get.
We’ll finish off where we came in, on the subject of marriage. The following video had me in stitches. Be warned, there’ some very colorful language: don’t watch it if the kids are around – or if you have custody this weekend.
I hope you enjoyed my post. And because I want to see you all back here regularly, I am offering a free copy of Looking for Mr. Goodstory to anyone who joins my blog! It’s a collection of my favorite blog posts over the last six months – all you have to do is join up, then write to me at colin underscore falconer underscore author at hotmail dot com. I’ll send you a copy as a mobi Epub or PDF file!